Letter for XX

When we met for the first time, I saw your smile, and it made me happy..it was a beautiful smile, sweetest smile and until now I never forget your smile.and I think, it was fall in love at the first seight, maybe??!!

Time passed, lucky(or not) we were became close…we closer, and I could knew about you more and more, but I lost all that I think beautiful and sweet from you, your face and your perfomance that ‘pure’ and ‘innocent’ it was false!it was a little trick!, you were a people who ‘naughty’ and ‘crazy’, made me always angry and angry

I was think you used me like a toy, or like a child (although in that time we were children who step by step become teen), you said that I must changed…I did, but I confused, because you said again that I must changed, changed???how must I changed??

One day, in my memory, you said a confession to me..although in that time you were kidding, I didn’t care (in that time)but now when I remember it, I feel…can it be true?can it be true?like your kidding?a confession…from the deepest heart…?

Then I were angry with you because all your behavior, finally I took to be apart from you, honestly, I didn’t angry with you, but I was awoke, my feeling was awoke…truth was I like you…

When I saw you with the others, you were talked about many things, in the first time, I cried because jeolous, I cried!! I never think that I can cry because you. It was my false, and now I hug the regret .I Love you…

Until last day, I can’t to talk something for you, it’s a sadness, was it?. You gave me many things, smiles, jokes, and this feeling that never to erase from me.

I dreamed you…until now, 3x

And in the dreams, we met but we didn’t talk each other, we just stand and see each other, I felt there was something that ‘touch’ but I didn’t know what, what is the Love? The people said if someone met someone but they just silent, it means they met in the same dreams, hey…can I believe it?

And I tried to forget you, I tried to change my heart, but..you know…I can’t!! I have try so hard, and..the answer…still can’t!my heart still think about you, still remember about you!!

5 years..after I met you, 5 years I love you, and I want to try can I wait ‘the destiny’ 5 years again?if 5 years again, you’re not my destiny…I just say GOOD BYE, but if you’re my destiny, I just say THANKS GOD..

Note :

It's my letter, ai no reteru, i wrote it 2 years ago, and until now, my self still same likes when i wrote it. Yeah...nothing to change from my self and my heart specially. Something that change is I met again with him, yeah...after 2 years past...and I hope this meeting not the last, but the beginning of new story for us. My feeling is not answer yet, but I want have a power to confess about it, 7 years not give me a enough power to can confess to him -_-, oh God....help me!!